


Does It Make It Better?

by someofthissomeofthat11011



Series: 65 Story Challenge [17]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-22
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-26 10:24:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14400174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/someofthissomeofthat11011/pseuds/someofthissomeofthat11011
Summary: Season 2 Episode 4. Takes place the night after Arthur and Merlin rescue Lancelot and Guinevere from Hengist's fortress. Lancelot prepares to leave, but Arthur doesn't let him. Arthur had a decision to make. He has to choose between what is right and his happiness.





	1. Letting Go

Season 2 Episode 4.

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 1: Letting Go

Arthur tossed and turned, but nothing he did would still his thoughts. No matter what he tried, sleep evaded him. His mind was filled with the look that Gwen and Lancelot had shared. Guinevere had certainly never looked at him like that.

Arthur knew the truth. He knew it deep within himself. It was excruciating to have these feelings for someone and know that they are not reciprocated. Gwen did not feel as strongly for him as she did for Lancelot, but Arthur wanted her to. Arthur wanted Gwen to look at him as if he were the center of her universe. He wanted her to feel as if they should never be apart. He wanted her to think about him as he often thought about her, but he knew it could never be. And it wouldn't be fair to expect Gwen to wait for him. It could be years… decades really before he became king. Gwen deserved to love and be loved by someone that wouldn't have to duck behind pillars at the sound of approaching footsteps so they wouldn't be seen together. She also deserved to love someone with all of her heart. She couldn't do that with Arthur. Her heart belonged with Lancelot.

But Arthur didn't want to let her go.

Arthur groaned, forfeiting his attempts to sleep. He got up and shook out his restless limbs. He could feel it building in his chest. The urge to scream at the unfairness of it all. As prince, he should be granted everything he could ever want, but he could not get the one thing his heart truly desired.

Arthur began to walk around the forest. It was dangerous, anything could be hidden in the shadows, but Arthur needed to do something. He had to work off the energy burning through him somehow. Besides, he had faith in his ability as a swordsman. If there was any trouble, he would be able to defend himself.

His walk did little to still his racing thoughts, but it did help Arthur resist the urge to punch a tree. Arthur didn't keep track of where he was walking and he stopped dead when he heard voices.

"What about you?" He heard Merlin ask. Arthur let out a silent sigh of relief. It was only Merlin. That sigh caught in his throat as Merlin continued. "Do you have feelings for Gwen?"

"My feelings do not matter. I will not come between them. Tell Gwen… tell Gwen that she has changed me forever, but some things cannot be," Lancelot answered. The blood drained from Arthur's face. Lancelot was leaving and if Arthur had a guess, the 'them' Lancelot had been talking about was him and Guinevere. He had a choice to make and he didn't have much time to make it.

Arthur stared into the darkness. It would be so easy. Let Lancelot go and leave Gwen open for him. Arthur pictured a future without Lancelot. A future where Gwen was willing to wait for him until he became king. A future where one day, Gwen and Arthur would be united and would remain united as long as they both shall live. It was a future that made Arthur's heart swell with happiness. But it was a future that could never be.

He had never thought he would have to choose between being happy and sacrificing that happiness for someone else. But the time had come and Arthur hated every minute of it. He wanted that beautiful future with Guinevere where one day they would be married and she would be his queen. As much as he wanted it, he knew it wasn't the right choice.

Arthur forced himself to let go of that future. As happy and as hopeful that it made him, he knew that it would never happen. Gwen's feelings for Lancelot were stronger than her feelings for Arthur. Lancelot was willing to give up his love and his happiness because he did not want to come between Arthur and Gwen. He truly was the most noble of men Arthur could ever know. Arthur would be fortunate if he became half the man Lancelot was.

He had a sour taste in his mouth as he stepped into the light so Merlin and Lancelot could see him. "You're leaving?" Arthur asked uncertainly.

Lancelot looked at the ground uncomfortably. "It is not my place to interfere with your feelings sire," Lancelot explained.

Arthur closed his eyes. He wanted to let Lancelot go, he really did. But what kind of person would he be if he allowed that? What kind of king would he be?

"You cannot leave Guinevere," Arthur said quietly. He ignored the stabbing pain in his chest. As much as it hurt, he knew he was making the right decision. "I know how she feels about you and more importantly, I know how she feels about me. The two cannot even compare. Her heart lies with you."

"But sire," Lancelot said shocked. Out of the corner of his eye, Arthur saw Merlin slip into the forest. Arthur was grateful. He didn't know how he knew, but somehow Merlin knew he needed to speak to Lancelot alone. Merlin always knew exactly what Arthur needed before Arthur realized it himself.

"You cannot deny your own feelings because I am a prince. What kind of leader am I if I believe myself to be more important than my people?" Arthur asked. "You are a good man and I value the nobility and judgment you displayed, but it is okay to put your feelings first. You should put your feelings first." Arthur looked Lancelot in the eye for the first time. "You have to be true to your heart."

"But you love her," Lancelot argued.

It was strange to hear someone say it out loud. Even Merlin hadn't had the nerve to accuse Arthur of loving Guinevere. Love was a powerful word. Hearing Lancelot say it, Arthur knew it was true; however, he also knew Lancelot loved her. "As do you," Arthur pointed out.

"I did not know that these feelings existed until I met Gwen, but you are the crowned prince of Camelot. It is my duty to place you before all else," Lancelot said.

"No, it's not," Arthur whispered. "Your duty is to your heart, not to me."

"Why are you so adamant about this?" Lancelot asked.

"Because I know that Guinevere loves you," Arthur said, finally looking up at Lancelot. "No matter how strongly I feel for Gwen, and perhaps because I feel so strongly for her, I cannot put her through the pain of loving me." Lancelot cocked his head with confusion, so Arthur explained. "I am a prince. One day I will be king, but that day is far in the future. My father is not an old man. He is not as young as he once was, but he is not old. He has many years left before he will even consider giving up the throne to me. Until I am king, the most I can offer her is to court Gwen in secret. When I see her during the day, I would have to pretend that there is nothing happening between us. That is not the type of relationship she deserves. I cannot make her wait years for a love that doesn't compare to the love she feels for you." Arthur felt strange talking about his feelings and talking about Gwen this way. He felt awkward trying to convince Lancelot to stay with Guinevere, but he persisted. "You and Gwen can be happy. You can walk around the town square without attracting unpleasant gossip. People won't judge you for being with her, and more importantly they won't judge Gwen for being with you. If you are as honorable of a man as I believe you are, you know what the right thing to do is."

"You are choosing to make yourself miserable?" Lancelot asked, his eyebrows shooting up his forehead.

"It was the same choice you were ready to make. The difference is I have an obligation to make that choice. It is my duty and it is the right thing to do."

"I… I don't know what to say," Lancelot said breathlessly.

"Don't say anything. Just go to Guinevere," Arthur told him. Arthur glanced up at Lancelot who hadn't moved an inch. "I'll stay on guard and take watch."

"Arthur," Lancelot said quietly.

"Go!" Arthur said harshly.

Lancelot hesitated for a moment, but realized that Arthur needed to be left alone. "Yes sire," Lancelot said. He bowed before he turned to walk away.

Arthur looked away from Lancelot and listened to the crunch of the leaves as he walked away. Arthur felt drained. He had just voiced all of his doubts about Guinevere and as he spoke, he knew them to be true. He knew he had made the right decision, but that did not lesson the heart ache he felt.

When Lancelot returned to where they made camp, he was surprised to see Merlin was still awake. He was staring into the depths of the dying fire. At the sound of Lancelot approaching, Merlin looked up. "Where's Arthur?" Merlin asked as he got to his feet.

"He's standing watch," Lancelot explain. Merlin nodded and began to walk towards where Arthur would be. "I think he wishes to be left alone," Lancelot added.

Merlin either didn't hear him or didn't care, because he kept walking.

Arthur was standing exactly where Lancelot had left him. He was forcing himself to accept exactly what he had done.

"I'm sorry," a voice came from the darkness. Merlin stepped into the light. Arthur nearly rolled his eyes. He should have guessed. Merlin was the only person that would try to talk to him right now. Most people wouldn't risk the prince's foul mood. But Merlin was never afraid.

"So now you know," Arthur said grimly.

"I've known for a long time Sire," Merlin pointed out.

Arthur sat down against a tree in the clearing. He simply didn't have the energy to stand anymore. Letting go of someone you love was a lot harder than he had anticipated. Arthur didn't know how long had passed before he spoke. "Does it make it better?" He asked Merlin, his voice void of emotions.

"Sire?" Merlin asked confused.

"Does it make it better that I admitted my feelings for Gwen earlier? Does it make it better for you that you pushed me to realize them when nothing can ever happen between us?" Arthur asked, anger slowly creeping into his voice. He was furious with Merlin for forcing him to acknowledge his feelings for Gwen. He was angry at life for putting him in the circumstance where he would suffer unrequited love. He was angry at himself for allowing himself to develop such strong feelings for a servant. As quickly as it had sprung up in him, the fight left him. Arthur knew he wasn't angry with Merlin. Mostly, he just felt empty "Does it make it better?" He asked in a hollow voice.


	2. Heartbreaks

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 2: Heartbreaks

Merlin was silent for a moment, contemplating Arthur's question. Does it make it better? "It doesn't make it better," he said quietly.

"Then why the hell did you push so hard. This outcome was a likely one. You knew that there was no chance for me and Guinevere to be together, so why would you press on and insist that I admit it?" Arthur yelled.

"Arthur, I know you are upset, but you cannot blame me," Merlin said harshly. "I know how much Gwen meant to you and I'm sorry that things ended this way, but you knew this was going to happen. Gwen's heart lies with Lancelot and you knew that. One day you will meet a maiden who will take your breath away. You will feel more strongly for her than you do for Gwen and that is the woman you are meant to be with."

Arthur made a noise that sounded like a choked chuckled. Merlin assumed that was Arthur's way of expressing his skepticism. "I know it hurts now. This is your first heartbreak, but you will get through this," Merlin said slowly. Arthur didn't usually express emotion like a normal human being, so Merlin wasn't entirely sure how to help him through this.

"What makes you think this is my first heartbreak?" Arthur asked.

"Because you are behaving like a child," Merlin told him bluntly.

Arthur winced, but did not say anything else. Merlin was right. He was behaving like a child. Arthur sat down against a tree and Merlin did the same. As suddenly as his anger had sprouted within him, so did his embarrassment.

Arthur stared off into the darkness. "I'm sorry… I don't know what has gotten into me," Arthur said quietly.

"Yes you do," Merlin pointed out. "The way you are feeling, it's natural. Every person has their heart broken at some point. I know you hold yourself to a different set of standards that most people, but that doesn't mean you cannot be upset when you feel like someone is trying to tear your heart out of your chest."

"Have you?" Arthur asked surprised. "Have you had your heart broken?"

"There are many different types of heartbreaks," Merlin told him. "I was heartbroken when I was a boy and my mother told me I would never have a father. I was heartbroken when Will died. You don't need to lose the woman you love to be heartbroken."

Arthur stared. Merlin had sounded so defensive. He had said some mumbo jumbo about different types of heartbreaks. What was that about? A broken heart was a broken heart! If Merlin thought Arthur was going to let him dodge the question, he didn't know Arthur very well. "You've had your heart broken by a girl, haven't you?" Arthur asked suspiciously. He couldn't imagine anyone loving Merlin, but perhaps that was just because Arthur had seen him at his clumsiest.

"I had a life in Ealdor," Merlin said dryly. "Of course I've had my heart broken by a girl."

"When?" Arthur asked. He watched Merlin with curiosity. Merlin rarely talked about his life in Ealdor.

A dark look came over Merlin's face. "I don't think you really want to hear about that." Merlin didn't want to hear Arthur's taunts about how much of a girl Merlin was for allowing himself to be hurt by some girl. And even now, the memories of her still hurt.

"Please," Arthur whispered. Merlin looked at Arthur surprised. Arthur never said please.

Perhaps it was the please, or maybe it was the vulnerable expression on Arthur's face, but Merlin found himself talking. "There was this girl. She had moved to Ealdor to stay with her aunt about a year before I came to Camelot. She was two years younger than me, but she was so beautiful," Merlin said, lost in his memories. The time he had known her had been one of the happiest of his life.

"What was her name?" Arthur asked curiously.

"Helen," Merlin told him, smiling slightly. "She hated that name. She insisted I call her Mary. That was her middle name and she felt it was much nicer than Helen."

After a moment when Merlin didn't continue with his story, Arthur prompted him to keep going. "What happened?"

"We started courting," Merlin said quietly. "She was younger, but you couldn't tell. She showed maturity and wisdom that you seldom see in women twice her age. About a month before I came here, she was attacked by some boys in Ealdor. They had seen her using magic and had teased her, calling her a freak. They tried to get her to use it again. They hit her and kicked her and threw things at her. I didn't even know that she knew magic. She had been too afraid to tell me. If I had known, maybe I could have been there to protect her." Merlin cut himself off. It was something that he found impossible to forgive himself of. He hadn't trusted her with his secret and perhaps if he had, she would still be alive. Perhaps she would have trusted him with her secret. "They had hurt her so badly that there was nothing the physician in Ealdor could do. She died three days later." Merlin had a far off look in his eyes. He hated that he hadn't been able to see her. He knew he could have saved her, but his mother wouldn't let him. She feared that someone would see him doing magic and would attack him as well. Mary dying had prompted his mother into sending him to Camelot. She no longer believed that he would be safe in Camelot.

"I'm sorry," Arthur said sincerely. "I had no idea. When you came here, I hadn't even realized…"

"I hid it well," Merlin said with a shrug. "Besides, you saw me a month later. I had had time to mourn and control myself so that no one else would realize I was still hurting."

Arthur watched Merlin with amazement. He can't imagine the pain of losing someone like that. At least Guinevere was still alive. She was in the arms of another man, but she was alive. "Does it still hurt you?" Arthur asked.

"You never really get over it," Merlin said quietly. There was no point in lying to Arthur. Merlin wanted to prepare him for what he was about to go through. Coddling him and covering up the truth wouldn't help him. "There are nights where I feel the pain as if I had just lost her. Those are the nights where I feel like I'll never get over it and I don't believe that I will. You'll understand what I mean. You'll have good days and bad days. There will be days where you'll want to rip Lancelot apart because he is with Guinevere. But one day you will meet that special woman that will make it all worth it."

Arthur leaned back against the tree. His eyelids suddenly felt very heavy. It had been a strange night and right now, he wanted to allow sleep to overcome him just so he could stop feeling the pain. So that's exactly what he did.

The next few weeks were the worst. Arthur had to pretend that nothing was wrong as he went about his princely duties. He was so grateful for Merlin's help. Even when Arthur was in his foulest mood and was throwing things about his chambers, Merlin didn't leave. He may not have said anything, but just knowing he was there helped.

Eventually it got better. Arthur was able to see Lancelot and Gwen together without wanting to punch a wall. It still hurt, but it was bearable now. Arthur looked back at his behavior and felt embarrassed by how he had behaved. Fortunately Merlin never mentioned his childish behavior and he certainly never brought it up.

The weeks turned into years. Everything was different now. Arthur had long forgotten about the ache that had once consumed him. Lancelot and Gwen had married and had a little girl now. Arthur worked with Lancelot often, while training his knights or while they were on a mission, but he rarely saw Gwen. It wasn't him being petty, he simply had so much to do and since Morgana decided to try to kill him and his father and reveal she had magic, Gwen was working in a different part of the castle.

Arthur thought bitterly on the memories of his half-sister. He had loved Morgana like a sister, that didn't change when he found out she really was his sister, and her betrayal still stung. Arthur finally understood what Merlin had meant all those years ago when he said there were different types of heartbreaks. The ache he felt after Morgana's betrayal was just as strong as when he had given up Gwen, but it hurt in a different way.

And it was entirely different than the ache he felt when his father passed away. Morgana had been relentless in her attempts on the king's life and eventually she had succeeded, leaving Arthur with no family and an entire kingdom to rule at a very ripe age.

The only thing that was the same, was Merlin. He was still there by Arthur's side, giving him counsel and serving him. Merlin had been an endless source of patience and wisdom over the years. He had offered Arthur a listening ear when Arthur hadn't realized he needed one, and had told Arthur he was being a clotpole when Arthur was being too much of a clotpole to admit it. Arthur had become the man he was thanks to Merlin.

But there was still a part of Arthur that was missing. He longed for someone to love and for someone to love him. He longed for a woman that he could make his queen. Merlin had told him to be patient, but he had been waiting years. Still he persisted, because what else could he do?


	3. To Kill the King

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 3: To Kill the King

Time passed. The pain Arthur had suffered was naught but a foggy memory to him now. Merlin had been right when he said that the pain would never fully go away, but that it would get better. Nearly seven years had gone by. The king was catching up on some much needed sleep. He hadn't had the chance to get a proper night's sleep in weeks.

There was a clap of thunder that was so loud it woke him up. Arthur was ready to roll over and curse the Gods that they wouldn't let him sleep, but with the next flash of lightning he could see the silhouette of someone standing over him, holding a dagger. Arthur's fatigue was forgotten as he jumped out of bed, letting out a gruff scream when his legs tangled in his bed sheets causing him to fall to the ground in a heap.

Arthur forced himself to roll, figuring he was a harder target if he was moving. His instincts proved correct as he watched the dagger embed itself in the floor board where he had been moments before.

Arthur tried to unravel himself, but he didn't have the time to. Every time he moved, he got more tangled in his sheets, but he didn't have the luxury of staying still. He didn't know who was attacking him or why, but he was not making this easy for them.

Arthur heard a loud bang, then the thump of someone hitting the floor. He turned to see his attacker on the ground. There were shattered pieces of glass around them. He looked up and saw Merlin holding all that remained of a water pitcher. He finally pushed himself out of his bed sheets.

Arthur was slightly mortified. He had practically been helpless, unable to defend himself.

"What the hell just happened?" Merlin asked looking at Arthur incredulously.

"I was attacked," Arthur said bluntly. "I would think even someone of your limited mental capacity would realize that."

"But why? What did you do?" Merlin asked.

"Why do you think I did something?" Arthur asked slightly wounded.

Merlin didn't answer. Instead, he rolled the intruder over and pulled off their hood. He gasped and Arthur looked over to see why.

"It's a woman," Arthur said slowly. That had been the last thing he had expected.

"It appears so," Merlin agreed. He began inspecting her. He wanted to see how serious her injuries were. He supposed it didn't matter. Attempting to kill the king was grounds for treason and the punishment for treason was death. But he examined her anyway. He opened her eyelids and immediately withdrew his hand. "She's being controlled. Her actions were not her own."

"What makes you so certain?" Arthur asked surprised.

"Look at her eyes," Merlin prodded.

Arthur hesitantly pulled up her eyelids. They were pure white. "Could that be because she is unconscious?" Arthur asked uncertainly.

Merlin shook his head. He put his finger over his lips and motioned for Arthur to go outside. Once they were in the hallway, Merlin spoke. "When someone is unconscious, their eyes roll up, but you can still see the roots of their pupil and iris and usually can see the ciliary when their eyes roll," Merlin explained.

Arthur stared at him. "Either you just made up those words or you have been spending far too much time with Gaius," he said.

Merlin ignored him. Now was not the time for jokes. "Did you see how her eyes were pure white as if they have been replaced by marbles? Someone else was seeing for her. While her eyes were closed, the person that has bewitched her will only see darkness, but I wasn't sure what she would hear," Merlin told him.

Arthur nodded. "You suspect Morgana," he noted. "You said she."

Merlin nodded. "Who else has the power to bewitch someone so?" He asked sadly. He still blamed himself for Morgana's betrayal. She had put her faith and trust in him, yet he had not done the same. She had no one to turn to when her magic overwhelmed her and eventually that was her undoing. Her magic had left her in such a fragile position that she was in no state to argue when Morgause offered her solutions.

Arthur nodded. Merlin's logic was sound. Surely if there were another magician as powerful as Morgana, Arthur would know by now. "Is there any way to fix her?" He asked uncertainly.

"I'm not sure," Merlin answered. "I'll have to ask Gaius, but for now it would be dangerous for her to be without a guard. If she is being controlled, she will stop at nothing to kill you."

Arthur nodded. "Fetch the guards," he ordered. He went back into his bedchambers while Merlin went to get the guards. He knew he shouldn't be alone with her, but she was still unconscious. Surely she wasn't much of a threat.

Arthur cautiously approached the girl. She couldn't be much younger than him, he realized. She had wavy brown hair that trailed down her back. Arthur poked her as if he expected her to attack him again. He knew it was childish, but he had to check.

When she didn't move, he gently moved her so she was lying on her back instead of her side. Doing so caused her cloak clasp to open, revealing angry cuts chasing up her arms, disappearing underneath her dress. A few of them looked as if they had been hastily dressed. Arthur was grateful that he couldn't see what the covered ones looked like. When he saw the ones that weren't covered had a faint greenish-black color to them, he didn't want to know how badly the covered ones looked. Arthur felt his heart swell when he considered what she must have been through to have such marks and he had his suspicions that her arms weren't the only places she was injured. Arthur hastily covered her arms. He didn't want anyone to see them except for Gaius.

He gently pushed the girl's hair back so her face was clear. He traced her cheekbones lightly.

Arthur wasn't sure what he was doing or why. He felt strangely connected to the girl. He wanted to protect her. It was odd, considering she had just tried to kill him.

Arthur shook his head, trying to clear it. He was being foolish. She had tried to kill him and the punishment for that was death. But if Merlin was right and this girl's actions were not her own, how could Arthur sentence her to that fate? Arthur remembered the cuts on her arms. Some were shallow and some were deep, but Arthur was no physician. He did not know if any of her injuries were life threatening or if they would be able to heal on their own.

Merlin returned then with two guards. Arthur looked up at them and then glanced back at the girl. He was going to have her spend the night in the prison, but his conscience would not allow it. She needed to get properly examined. "You are to take her to Gaius's chambers. Have him treat her for her injuries. And make sure a guard is always with her. Restrain her if you must, but do not kill her," Arthur told them. "When she wakes, someone is to alert me immediately."

"Yes sire," one of his men said, bowing slightly. They carefully picked up the girl and began to walk to Gaius's chambers.

Once the guards were gone, Merlin turned to Arthur, a question burning in his eyes. Arthur glanced at Merlin, ready to tell him that he didn't have to justify his decisions, but something in Merlin's expression stopped him.

"I could not allow her to sit in the cells with the injuries she had," Arthur told him. He couldn't tell Merlin about the strange connection he felt towards the girl. He didn't understand it himself, how was he supposed to explain it to someone else? But he could tell him the half-truth.

"I didn't hurt her that badly," Merlin protested. "Alright I may have accidentally given her a concussion, but nothing life threatening."

Arthur shook his head. "She had deep cuts on her arms," Arthur explained. "I don't know what they were from, but they didn't look good. I don't even want to think about what other injuries she may have. And you said yourself that she was being controlled by Morgana. I can't condemn her to death when she's not responsible for her actions and if I'm not condemning her to death, she needs to get treated."

Merlin nodded, surprised at how defensive Arthur got. "I'm going to speak with Gaius. I may be of some assistance with her injuries and hopefully he knows how to break Morgana's hold on her," Merlin said.

Arthur nodded and looked out the window. Merlin started to walk towards the door. "Merlin?" Arthur called. "Please keep me updated."

"Of course Sire," Merlin promised. Merlin stepped aside and shook his head to clear his confusion. Arthur's behavior was strange to say the least.


	4. Let's Not Tell Arthur

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 4: Let's Not Tell Arthur

Merlin hurried to Gaius's chambers. Gaius was arguing with one of the knights. "I cannot examine her with you breathing over me. I insist that you wait outside," Gaius said annoyed.

"We have orders from the king," one of the guards protested.

"I'll stay with Gaius," Merlin told them. One of the guards turned to Merlin, surprised to see him. "I'm sure if you ask King Arthur, he would be open to that alternative."

"But…" One of the guards started to protest.

"Or I could go ask him myself and also let him know how much you are delaying Gaius's examination while I'm at it," Merlin threatened.

The two guards exchanged uneasy glances. They had faced Arthur's wrath enough to know it would be best if that were avoided. "If King Arthur gets angry over this, I will accept full responsibility," Merlin promised.

One of the guards sighed. "I suppose it couldn't hurt," he muttered. "She is unconscious after all."

"Thank you," Gaius said blandly. He gestured towards the door. He waited until the door was closed to turn to Merlin.

"What's wrong with her?" Merlin asked before Gaius had a chance to ask any questions.

"I believe she is being possessed," Gaius told him. "But I've never seen magic like this."

"Can I heal her?" Merlin asked uncertainly.

"I do not know, but you can try," Gaius said. "See if you can find something that will reverse the effects of Morgana's magic. I'm going to tend to her other wounds."

Merlin nodded and went to his chambers to pull out his magic book. He was immersed in the section on spells and enchantments for possessing someone. He was just getting into counter curses when he heard Gaius gasp.

Merlin looked up. "What is it?" He asked.

"I think you best come look at this," Gaius said quietly.

Merlin got up and looked at what had made Gaius so shocked. Gaius was pointing to a large burn on the girl's back. At first it didn't seem to be anything out of the ordinary, but then Merlin realized the shape of the burn. It was in the shape of a circle. Inside the circle, was a spidery 'C.'

"What does it mean?" Merlin asked him uncertainly.

"Many slave traders will brand the people they are selling into slavery. I have heard of some that use their king's name as a brand," Gaius said slowly. "I had my suspicions that Morgana was working with Cenred, now I have proof. Morgana used one of Cenred's slaves to do her bidding."

"She's a slave?" Merlin asked horrified. Merlin had known that the black market for slave trade was very active; however, he also knew that they preferred men who would be able to adequately serve someone.

Gaius nodded and continued to dress her wounds. "You best hurry if you are to find a counter curse," Gaius warned. "I can only examine a patient for so long. Someone will begin to get suspicious."

Merlin went back to his book. After several more minutes, he found a spell he hoped would work. If Morgana's spell was too intricate or powerful, it wouldn't work, but Merlin was counting on the fact that Morgana had far too much faith in her own abilities to use anything that would be difficult to break.

Merlin went and stood over the girl. He put his hands on either side of her head. "Gear sawol bisse ne gear handum. Drycraeft durhaele dina wunda ond de geedstadolie. Du gear mod be gear. Bin suna," Merlin said. His eyes were squeezed tight and he was concentrating on his flow of magic.

Suddenly there was a coughing sound. The girl was sitting up and was taking in deep breaths as if she had been without air for some time. When she looked up at Merlin, he could see that her eyes had returned to their normal color, a soft blue. For a moment, the girl looked so at peace. Then you could literally see the weight of the world crash down on her.

When the girl saw Merlin and Gaius, she scampered to her feet and walked backwards until her back hit the wall.

"It's okay," Merlin said gently. He tentatively took a step towards the girl "You're okay. We are not going to harm you. We're here to help."

"No one can help me! Go away," the girl said. She sounded terrified.

"Please, we are your friends. You can trust us," Merlin said.

"Please leave me alone," the girl pleaded. "It's not safe."

Merlin took another step towards the girl. She let out a whimper of fear. Suddenly, thousands of pieces of glass were soaring towards Merlin.

Merlin held up his hand and the shards stopped midair. He didn't know where they had come from, but he was shocked to realize the girl had magic. Merlin suspected that may be why Morgana selected her. "You can trust us," Merlin repeated. "We won't tell the king."

"You know magic," the girl whispered. The hairs on Merlin's neck stood on end. He knew he was in no danger. If the girl tried to tell Arthur, Merlin would tell him she was still under Morgana's influence. But he didn't want it to come to that.

"As do you," Merlin pointed out. "What is your name?"

"Iryna," she said softly. She was still looking at Merlin and Gaius anxiously.

"Well Iryna, it's nice to meet you. I'm Merlin," Merlin said, extending his hand.

Iryna stared at his hand as if she expected it to turn into a snake and attack her. Reluctantly she extended her hand and accepted his gesture.

"Why am I here?" Iryna asked.

Merlin and Gaius exchanged uneasy glances. "You tried to kill the king," Merlin said softly. "We believe you were under the influence of Morgana."

The moment she heard Morgana's name, Iryna's eyes widened with fear. "It's not safe here. I must leave," she said fearfully as she made a break for the door.

"No! You cannot leave," Merlin told her, blocking her exit. "Arthur would have my head if I let you leave."

"You don't understand," Iryna said, tears streaming down her face. "Morgana ordered me to kill the king!"

"We gathered that," Merlin said dryly.

"Please, I cannot hurt him. Please, let me leave," Iryna begged. "I am free from her influence right now, but I won't be for much longer. She'll realize that I have failed and she'll come back for me."

"We won't let her get to you," Merlin promised.

"What can you do?" Iryna asked bitterly. "She's a high priestess. My magic wasn't enough to stop her. Why would yours be any different?"

Merlin hesitated. "I am much more powerful than I seem," he admitted.

"There are some that prophesize that he is the most powerful sorcerer to ever walk this Earth," Gaius added.

Iryna shook her head. "The most powerful sorcerer to ever walk this Earth is Emrys," Iryna argued. "My master told me about him when I was just a child."

Merlin looked away from her. It was one thing to reveal to her that he had magic, but he wasn't willing to share with her his true identity. If Morgana did recapture her, Merlin didn't want her to have that information. Merlin was preoccupied with hiding his identity, he didn't pick up on what Iryna's words implied. Fortunately, Gaius noticed.

"Your master? You're a druid," Gaius said surprised.

Iryna nodded. "I was selected when I was seven years old," she explained. "I apprenticed with my master for nearly ten years. When he was killed, I went off on my own. Four years ago, I was captured by two men. I didn't know what they were at first. For nigh on half a year, I was sold from person to person. Then one day, I was put to work. I used my magic to make my tasks easier for me. I had to or else I would have died from exhaustion. But that's how Morgana found me. I have suffered under at her hands for a very long time. You can't possibly understand how powerful she is. That is why you must let me go!"

"Just trust me," Merlin told her. "We will keep you safe from Morgana."

Iryna didn't look like she believed him. "And who is going to keep me safe from the king? I have magic and I tried to kill him. I'm surprised I'm still alive," she said bitterly. Morgana had shouted about the evils of the king and about how he has hardened his heart in his refusal to rule justly. Morgana was trying to convince her to kill the king, but Iryna had refused. She may not like the king, but she wasn't going to kill a man in cold blood. That's when Morgana took other measures.

"He's decided to pardon you for attempting to kill him as he knows your will was not your own. And as for the magic… How about this?" Merlin asked. "Let's not tell Arthur about everything that happened in here."

Iryna fought the smile that was threatening to cross her face. "Deal," she agreed.


	5. Magic

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 5: Magic

Merlin hesitated before he spoke next. "I don't want to frighten you, but Arthur ordered me to alert him the moment you woke up. I've put up with enough of his tantrums to know that it's best to listen to him," Merlin said apologetically.

"Merlin!" Gaius chastised.

"What? It's true," Merlin pointed out, a small smile on his face. "I'll be back soon, but Arthur might come back with me. I just wanted to prepare you for that possibility."

"Before you go, can I ask you something?" Iryna asked him uncertainly.

"Ask me anything," Merlin told her.

Iryna bit her lip. She wasn't sure how Merlin would receive her question. "You speak of Arthur like he is your friend, yet he is the king. I would think that someone with your particular abilities would be terrified to be near him."

"It is terrifying. I fear every day that he will somehow discover my powers, but I have an obligation to serve him. And truth be told, Arthur is my truest friend," Merlin explained with a shrug. "No matter how terrifying it is to serve him, I wouldn't have it any other way."

Iryna frowned. "But if he found out about your powers, he would kill you," she pointed out.

"I'm not so sure about that," Merlin said honestly. "He may kill me, but there is also the chance that he would accept me. I have served him for almost ten years. Aside from my magic, he knows me better than I know myself. I believe in him and I believe that one day, he will accept me for my powers."

Iryna scrunched up her forehead as she considered Merlin's words. "When I was with Morgana, she told me of the evils of your king. She made him seem like some vile man, a man who is merciless, yet you make him seem…" She struggled to find the right words.

"Like a human being?" Merlin suggested. "Morgana has been consumed by hatred and her need for revenge for far too long. She has lost the ability to see all that is good and right. Arthur is not perfect, far from it in fact. He isn't the most intelligent of people and he's more stubborn that I care to admit. He also has the tendency to act like a complete and utter clotpole, but he is a good man. He is kind and compassionate and he is always willing to listen to his people. He has brought justice and peace to his kingdom. He's a great king even if he doesn't recognize that yet."

"You are too kind Merlin," Arthur's voice came from the doorway. Merlin spun around, hoping that he would not see the king standing at the door. But sure enough, Arthur was standing there with a stony expression on his face.

"M-M-My lord," Merlin stammered. "How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough. The guards came to fetch me when they heard a female's voice. They alerted me that they believed that the girl had woken up," Arthur said, not taking his eyes off of Merlin.

"The girl is standing right here, and she happens to have a name," Iryna said with as much attitude as she was capable of.

Arthur seemed taken aback by her behavior. "And what may that name be?" Arthur asked.

"Iryna," she said, throwing as much sass into her name as possible.

Arthur couldn't help but smile. Iryna. That was a beautiful name. "You have a lovely name," Arthur said respectfully.

"Thank you," Iryna said surprised. Her cheeks were tinged pink from his compliment. She hadn't received many compliments while she was a slave and wasn't entirely sure how to respond.

Arthur turned back to Merlin. "A word if you please," Arthur said curtly.

Merlin hung his head. "Yes my lord," Merlin said nervously. He started to follow Arthur out of the room.

"Wait!" Iryna called. "What are you going to do to him?"

"That doesn't concern you," Arthur told her.

Iryna looked up at Arthur. "Your servant spoke of your kindness and compassion. Most importantly he spoke of your just judgment. I would hate for you to prove him wrong," Iryna said slowly.

Arthur looked at her confused. "I'll admit I'm rather sour that he disobeyed me and didn't alert me the moment you woke up, but I don't see how my judgment plays into that. I was going to have him muck out the stables, but I didn't think I was being that harsh," Arthur said confused.

Iryna stared at Arthur. After a moment, she realized her jaw had dropped. She quickly closed her mouth. "That's what you wanted to speak to him about?" She asked uncertainly.

"For the most part," Arthur said with a shrug. He was watching Iryna curiously. "Was there something else I should speak to him about?"

"No!" Iryna and Merlin said at the same time. They glanced at each other and smiled amused.

Arthur shook his head. "I feel like I'm missing something," he muttered grumpily.

"You wanted to speak with me?" Merlin asked, holding open the door with a smile on his face.

Arthur sighed then walked out. "What did I miss?" He asked when the door closed behind him.

"Nothing. Now I know you didn't want me to come out here so you could yell at me for not alerting you that she woke up," Merlin said. "What do you want?"

"What did you find out about the girl… about Iryna?" Arthur asked.

"She was a slave," Merlin whispered. "For years she was a slave. And then Morgana chose her for the special task of killing you. Her spell has worn off and Iryna's mind is her own."

"Are you certain?" Arthur asked.

Merlin nodded. "You could always ask her yourself," Merlin suggested. "I'm sure she would have a couple of choice words for you. She doesn't really have a problem expressing herself."

"I've noticed," Arthur said dryly. "She seems to take after a certain manservant's lack of respect."

Merlin rolled his eyes. "Do you want to speak with her?" Merlin asked.

Arthur chewed his lip. "Not yet. I want to give her time to rest," Arthur said.

Merlin studied him for a moment. "She really isn't dangerous Arthur," Merlin said quietly. "You have nothing to be afraid of."

"I'm not afraid," Arthur snapped defensively.

"Then why do you not wish to see her? You were rather adamant about being alerted the moment that she woke up," Merlin pointed out.

"I'm the king Merlin. You cannot expect me to justify myself to you," Arthur said as snobbily as he could.

"Of course, Sire." Merlin's tone was spoken as disrespectfully as possible. He bowed low to the ground before he turned and walked back inside.

Arthur watched him go. If he was being honest with himself, he knew why he didn't want to speak with her yet. This strange connection he felt with her frightened him. He wasn't ready to face that yet. So in a way, he was afraid. Just not in the way Merlin had implied.

But, he was king. And part of being king was doing things regardless of how much they frighten you. Arthur forced himself to walk through the doors. Merlin was sitting at Gaius's work bench and looked very smug when Arthur walked in. He got up to speak to Arthur, no doubt to make a rude comment to him when it happened. Merlin's leg didn't quite make it over the bench and Merlin began to fall head first. Arthur watched with horror. He was too far away, there was nothing he could do to prevent this. In most cases, this fall wouldn't have been a big deal, but Merlin's arms didn't seem to want to react. He was going to hit the ground head first. Many people have died from such an injury.

Iryna, who hadn't noticed that Arthur had re-entered the room, looked up when she heard Merlin's terrified cry. Her heart pounded as she watched him fall. Instinctively, she sent a pillow over to block Merlin's fall. She could feel the adrenaline coursing through her. She had little control over her magic. It just happened when her emotions were particularly strong. She would think something and then it would happen. It was something her master hadn't particularly cared to help her with while she was studying with him. Lots of people had magic, but very few people had her special ability. That's what he had chosen to work with her on to help her special powers grow.

Relief washed over her when Merlin hit the ground with a soft thud and immediate clambered to his feet.

"Arthur, that's not what it looked like," Merlin said frantically.

Arthur was staring at him. "You used magic?" He said as if the words didn't make sense in a sentence like that.

Iryna watched them confused. Didn't Arthur realize what she had done. Then she understood. Merlin was giving her a chance. He was taking responsibility for the magic she had wielded.

"I'm sorry," Merlin said softly, hanging his head. "I didn't mean to. It just happened."

"It just happened?" Arthur asked incredulously. "How does magic just happen?"

"I was falling and all I could think about was how much a pillow would soften my fall and then it was there," Merlin said quietly.

Gaius sat down where he was standing. He could hear his heart pounding in his head. In all the ways he envisioned Merlin getting caught, it was never this way.

"Stop!" Iryna said frantically. "It wasn't Merlin that used magic! It was me."

"No," Merlin said, shooting her a look to stay quiet.

But Iryna wasn't a very good listener. "I was born with my powers. I don't know how they work or how to control them. I just know when I get very scared, they kick in. I would never use them to hurt someone," Iryna said softly.

"Ignore her Arthur," Merlin said quickly. "She doesn't know what she's talking about. She's going through a traumatic experience."

Arthur didn't take his eyes off of Merlin. He didn't know what to think right now. This wouldn't be the first time Merlin had claimed to have magic to protect someone, but somehow Arthur felt he was telling the truth. "How do I know you aren't just trying to protect her?" Arthur asked.

With a flick of his wrist, Merlin created a soft torrent of wind that gently blew Arthur's hair back.

Arthur nodded and walked out without a word.

Merlin stared after him confused. What just happened?


	6. Does Everyone Have Magic?

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 6: Does Everyone Have Magic?

"Do I go after him?" Merlin asked uncertainly. There was no protocol for what to do when the king of Camelot discovers you have magic. Well there was, but that would entail Merlin being tied to a pyre and then lit on fire and he would rather avoid that.

"I'm not sure," Gaius said honestly.

"You shouldn't have done that," Iryna said sharply.

Merlin shook his head. "Arthur would have had you killed. He wouldn't have had a choice. But it will be more difficult for him to sentence me to death," Merlin told her. "I wasn't about to let you get executed."

"But what if he sentences you to death anyway?" Iryna asked.

"Then I ask that you look after him. I don't know what it is, but there's something between you two. A strange connection. I know Arthur has felt it, even if he won't admit it, and I suspect you have felt it to," Merlin said softly. "Just take care of him."

Merlin didn't say another word as he walked out of Gaius's chambers. He needed to know what his punishment would be. If he was to die, he would die knowing that Arthur was in good hands. He didn't know what was to happen between Iryna and Arthur, but he knew that he would be safe with her.

Merlin hesitated when he stood outside of the king's chambers. He wasn't certain that Arthur would be inside, but instinct told him that is where he would find him. Merlin considered knocking, but he had never done that before. He wasn't about to start now.

Merlin pushed open the doors and entered Arthur's chambers. Arthur was sitting on the edge of his bed staring off into space. He had a perplexed look on his face and Merlin didn't quite know what to think of that. Arthur was acting strange.

Merlin had expected Arthur to jump to his feet and shout obscenities at him. He had been expecting him to shout about lies and betrayal, but he didn't do that. He glanced up at Merlin when he entered then went back to his thoughts.

"Arthur?" Merlin asked hesitantly. There was no response from Arthur. Merlin worried that the shock had been too much for Arthur and that maybe it had mentally damaged him. "Arthur?" Merlin asked slightly louder.

Arthur glanced up at Merlin. "Oh chores… I need you to set the fire, then polish my armor, then muck out the stables," Arthur said in a monotone.

"I… What?" Merlin asked. He was really starting to worry about Arthur's mental well-being.

"And walk my dogs," Arthur added.

"Arthur, I'm not here to do chores," Merlin told him gently.

"If you're asking for the day off, the answer is no," Arthur insisted.

"Arthur, stop dodging. We have to talk about what you saw. About what I am," Merlin told him.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Arthur said blankly. Somehow, Arthur's denial infuriated Merlin more than anything else had.

"Grow up Arthur!" Merlin shouted. "You are king! You can't pretend that you didn't see me use magic. I am a sorcerer and that is not going to go away just because you ignore it!" In retrospect, Merlin probably should have been relieved Arthur wasn't making a big deal about it, but it wasn't denial he sought. It was acceptance.

"I wish you to leave," Arthur said quietly.

"I'm not leaving until you talk to me," Merlin said stubbornly. "Why aren't you freaking out right now? Why aren't you telling me that I have betrayed you because I lied to you for years? Why aren't you calling the guards to drag me to the prison cells?"

"Do you want me to have you arrested?" Arthur asked uncertainly.

"No! Of course not," Merlin said with a sigh. "But in every situation I have ever imagined, when you found out about my magic, you were furious. Why aren't you furious?"

Arthur studied Merlin for a moment. "I don't know what to feel," he said seriously. He stood up so that he was level with Merlin. "I have known you a very long time. You have been in my service for over nine years. I know you better than I know myself. Your magic doesn't change what I know. But I am furious. More furious than I can put into words. Which is why I didn't want to talk about it yet. That's why I walked away." Arthur took a deep breath. He didn't want to shout at Merlin, but he was angrier than he ever had been with his manservant. "I don't know how I'm supposed to feel right now. You've had nine years to kill me. Everything my father ever taught me suggests that you should have killed me on day one. Or you should have turned on me the moment my father passed away. But you didn't. You still pretend to be a servant. Why? Why do you do this?"

Merlin stared at Arthur. The last thing he had expected was a rational conversation from Arthur. "I do it because I'm destined to serve you," Merlin said once he had gathered his thoughts. "I use my magic for you and only for you. So that you can be the king this land deserves."

"So I can be the king this land deserves," Arthur echoed. He shook his head. "When did you start studying magic?"

"When I came to Camelot. Gaius gave me a magic book so I could learn how to use my magic," Merlin explained.

"So you had already been using it," Arthur clarified.

"I've been using it since before I could talk," Merlin said with a shrug.

"How is that possible?" Arthur asked.

"I don't know," Merlin said honestly. "I don't know how it is possible that I was born with these powers, but I was. I just know that I am supposed to use them for you."

Arthur tried to wrap his head around that information. He nodded and sat back down on the edge of his bed.

"You're taking this well," Merlin said after Arthur hadn't said anything.

"Put yourself in my shoes. How would you be handling this?" Arthur asked him.

"I'm not sure," Merlin admitted. "I've tried to do that thousands of times and all of them ended the same way. With me tied to the pyre."

"You think I'd kill you?" Arthur asked with a deranged chuckle. "I may not trust you anymore, but I couldn't have you killed."

"Why not?" Merlin asked curiously. "I've always heard you speak of the evils of sorcery. Why aren't you accusing me of being evil?" If Merlin had known that Arthur would have taken it this well, he would have told him years ago.

"A couple of years ago, I would have. But you have always been there for me. With Guinevere and Morgana and my father. I don't know where I would be if it weren't for you. I can't just ignore that," Arthur said quietly. "When I found out you had magic, I expected to feel repulsed and betrayed, but really all I could think is that that made so much sense. And it does. I was too blind to see it and was too willing to accept your ridiculous excuses, but it was always there."

"So that's it?" Merlin asked. "Just like that, you accept that I have magic? Guards aren't going to storm into my chambers in the middle of the night to arrest me?"

"If I had them arrest you, would it do any good?" Arthur asked with a sad smile.

"Probably not. I would just break out," Merlin admitted.

"Figures," Arthur muttered. He didn't know what was going through his head right now. He felt guilty, knowing that his father hadn't raised him to befriend a sorcerer. He felt angry, knowing that Merlin had lied to him for years and years. But mostly, he felt relieved. Because he was finally able to figure out why things that should have gone disastrously wrong, suddenly went very right. He was finally able to place the last piece of the puzzle that was Merlin. There had always been something odd about Merlin, something that tugged at the back of Arthur's mind, but he had never been able to figure it out.

"So where does that leave us?" Merlin asked uncertainly.

Arthur was spared having to answer him by someone barging into his chambers. Merlin turned around, half expecting to see a guard. They were both surprised to see Iryna.

"You can't punish Merlin," she said breathlessly. "It truly was me that used magic before with the pillow. I can prove it!" Iryna concentrated. She had been able to do it before with Gaius. It was the first time she had been able to intentionally touch her magic. And the moment she had been able to do it, she sprinted to Arthur's chambers.

Once Iryna felt her magic flow through her, she manipulated it to make a pillow shoot towards Arthur. She overestimated how difficult it would be to move the pillow and the impact of the pillow made Arthur stumble forward. She hadn't intended for it to actually hit him.

"Oh no! My lord!" Iryna squeaked. She ran to Arthur's side. "I'm so sorry! I didn't think it would hit you." Iryna helped Arthur back to his feet. The moment she touched him, it was like an electric current flew through her. Startled, she immediately let go, causing Arthur to fall back down.

Shocked by what she had done, Iryna rushed to his side to help him back up, but ended up tripping over the pillow that she had thrown on him. Iryna's fall was softened by Arthur.

Iryna glanced down at Arthur mortified. She couldn't make herself move, even if she wanted to. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm not usually this clumsy. And I'm sorry that I let go of you before," she apologized.

"No," Arthur said surprised. He too had felt the strange shock when she had touched him before. "It's really alright."

After a moment, Iryna seemed to realize she was still lying on top of him. "Oops," she said embarrassed as she rolled off of him.

Arthur jumped to his feet then helped Iryna to hers. He held her hand just slightly longer than appropriate. When he withdrew his hand, he felt a strange emptiness wash over him. He noticed with pride that Iryna was blushing from their encounter.

Just like that, Arthur understood. Arthur understood what the strange connection between them was. He put his hand to his cheeks and could feel the warmth in them. He was blushing. He never blushes.

To cover up his embarrassment, Arthur spoke. "Does everyone have magic?"


	7. Fan the Flames

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 7: Fan the Flames

Merlin started hysterically laughing. Arthur and Iryna both looked at him concerned.

"What's so funny?" Arthur asked uncertainly. He was beginning to think that Merlin might actually have the mental affliction that Arthur often teased him about.

Merlin just shook his head. Arthur was head over heels for a sorcerer. The idea amused Merlin so much, he couldn't hide his laughter. It was one thing for Arthur to befriend a sorcerer, but it was very much different for him to fall in love with one.

Merlin wondered if the child of Arthur and Iryna would have magic as well. The thought of Arthur raising a sorcerer nearly sent him over the edge again.

Merlin forced himself to take deep breaths to calm himself. No doubt Arthur and Iryna thought he was insane, but his relief had made him giddy and then he had finally realized exactly what was happening between Arthur and Iryna, his giddiness had pushed him straight to hysterical. "Sorry," Merlin said when he caught his breath.

"Do you want to let us in on the joke?" Arthur asked.

Merlin studied Arthur for a moment. Arthur had come a long, long way from when Merlin first met him. He changed from a prat to a great king. But that didn't mean he was ready to admit the feelings he was starting to develop for Iryna. It was a huge step for Arthur to accept that Merlin had magic. A step Merlin wasn't entirely convinced he didn't imagine. He wasn't ready to admit he was falling in love with someone who had magic. "No. Not yet," Merlin said seriously. "I don't think you are ready to hear it."

Merlin didn't offer any further explanation before he bowed and left Arthur's chambers. He made his way back to Gaius's workshop, sporadically laughing on the way back. He attracted several weird looks, but he couldn't make himself care. He had never felt so free before. He may not be able to flaunt his magic, but Arthur knew about it. Arthur accepted it. That was more than he could ever have asked for.

Merlin walked into Gaius's workshop with a smile on his face. Gaius looked up anxiously. "What happened?" He asked. He frowned when he took in Merlin's smile. That was the last thing he had expected to see when Merlin walked in. If he was being honest, he didn't really think Merlin would be walking back in. He was certain that Arthur would have had Merlin arrested.

"He's okay with it," Merlin said breathlessly. "He's okay with my magic. He barely yelled at me."

Gaius's eyebrows shot up his forehead. "You are talking about Arthur, right?" Gaius asked.

"I'm as surprised as you are," Merlin said seriously. "I expected him to be furious, but he wasn't. He said that it made sense."

Gaius's jaw dropped. "Arthur?" He asked uncertainly. "Arthur the king."

"And that's not even the best part," Merlin said with a small smile. Gaius arched his eyebrows and looked at Merlin confused. "Iryna."

Gaius shook his head. "I have to admit that comes as a surprise. I was certain she was infatuated with Arthur. By the way she was pacing in here talking about how she had to make him come to his senses. But if you're happy with her, then I suppose…"

Merlin cut Gaius off. "I wasn't talking about me. I don't have feelings for her. Arthur is falling in love with Iryna," Merlin explained hastily. "Why would you think I was talking about me?"

"Well Iryna is very much like you. She has magic and isn't afraid to stand up to Arthur," Gaius pointed out. "And she isn't unattractive."

Merlin shook his head. He would never think of Iryna that way even if Arthur weren't developing feelings for her. She just wasn't the one for him. "No," Merlin said bluntly. "Morgana had magic and wasn't afraid to stand up to Arthur. You never accused me of being infatuated with her."

"That didn't mean I didn't think it," Gaius muttered.

"Morgana? Really Gaius?" Merlin asked incredulously. He rolled his eyes. Perhaps it was just because now Morgana was constantly trying to kill Arthur, but for some reason Merlin couldn't picture himself with her.

When Gaius didn't respond, Merlin got to his feet. "Where are you going?" Gaius asked him surprised.

"I have things to do," Merlin said vaguely. When the door closed behind Merlin, Gaius chuckled to himself. Merlin truly acted like his son sometimes.

Merlin hurried to the stables, briefly spoke with Sir Leon, and went to the kitchen before he went to Arthur's chambers. Arthur may not have acknowledged his feelings yet, but that didn't mean Merlin couldn't fan the flames a little bit. Merlin entered Arthur's chambers without knocking. His jaw nearly dropped. Iryna and Arthur were sitting at the table. Arthur was holding her hand and looked like he was comforting her. Merlin couldn't be sure, because he had never seen Arthur comfort someone, but he imagined that's what it would look like. Iryna was leaning towards Arthur, speaking to him in hushed tones which made Merlin think they may be talking about something rather serious.

Merlin briefly considered leaving, but then decided against it. He figured they could continue this conversation over a lovely picnic. He cleared his throat and Arthur and Iryna instantly dropped their hands. Arthur glared at Merlin angrily.

"I was wondering if you two would like to go on a picnic?" Merlin asked, shooting Arthur a smug look. "The stable hands are preparing three horses as we speak and the cook is reluctantly preparing a meal for you two. I figured it would be nice for both of you to get some fresh air."

Iryna looked down, a faint blush coloring her cheeks. She wanted to go on this picnic so badly, but she wasn't sure if Arthur would want to. She didn't want him to think she was rushing into anything. She had just met him and on top of that she had tried to kill him. She couldn't imagine that he would be overly fond of her.

Merlin winked at Arthur the moment Iryna wasn't looking. Arthur glared at Merlin. Sometimes he wished his manservant wouldn't interfere in his life. "Three horses?" Arthur asked.

"Well I wouldn't expect you to serve yourself. And it would be rather suspicious if you went on a hunting trip without me," Merlin pointed out.

Arthur closed his eyes. "You already told my knights I was going on a hunting trip, didn't you," Arthur asked.

"Yes sire," Merlin said, his smile growing smugger by the second.

"I suppose you leave me no other choice then," Arthur said, trying to sound grumpy. In reality, he was so excited at the prospect of spending some time with Iryna, but he didn't want her to know. Everything was happening so quickly and he didn't want to make her uncomfortable.

"Iryna, if you wish to wash up, you can go back to Gaius's workshop," Merlin told her. "We'll leave when you meet us at the stables."

Iryna nodded and rushed back to Gaius's chambers. Arthur spun to face Merlin. "What are you doing?" He asked. He wanted to get to the bottom of why Merlin was so adamant about them going on a picnic.

"It's obvious you like her. Don't deny it," Merlin told him. "And I know she cares for you as well."

"I've only just met her. And she tried to kill me," Arthur protested. "Besides how can I like someone that I don't even know?"

"What better way to get to know her than on a picnic?" Merlin asked victoriously.

Arthur sighed. "Lot of good a picnic will be with you tagging along with us," Arthur muttered.

Merlin rolled his eyes. "You won't even know I am there," Merlin promised.

Arthur bit his lip. "You really think she cares for me?" Arthur asked Merlin uncertainly.

Merlin rolled his eyes. "You really can be a complete cabbage head sometimes," Merlin told him. "Now I've got to get the food from the cook. I suggest you come with me unless you're planning on sitting in here daydreaming about Iryna."

"I do not daydream!" Arthur protested. He reluctantly followed Merlin to the kitchen and then to the stables. He had to admit. Seeing the cooks expression go from outraged at Merlin to compliant when she noticed Arthur was rather hilarious.

Merlin took the basket with a stony look on his face as he muttered something about double standards.

Arthur followed Merlin to the stables where they waited for Iryna. Arthur paced anxiously as the minutes ticked by. He was beginning to worry Iryna wouldn't show up.

The sun had only risen a couple of hours ago and they had both had long nights. Arthur wouldn't be surprised if she had decided to catch up on some sleep instead. Or maybe she was just too hungry. Arthur's stomach was growling rather fearsomely at him for skipping breakfast.

All of Arthur's fears were abated when he heard the soft patter of footsteps coming towards him. He couldn't help the smile that spread across his face when he saw Iryna.


	8. Perfect Day for a Picnic

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 8: Perfect Day for a Picnic

Iryna was wearing a pale blue gown that Arthur could have sworn he had seen Morgana wear before she had gone a little crazy. Her hair fell down her back in waves and her whole face was lit up with her smile.

"You look beautiful," Arthur told her sincerely. Suddenly he wished he had gotten Merlin to pick her flowers or something.

"Thank you," Iryna said with a small smile. "I ran into a maidservant on my way back to Gaius's. She had this dress from the woman she used to serve."

Arthur exchanged an uneasy glance with Merlin. "Was the woman you ran into Guinevere?" Arthur asked uncertainly.

"I'm not sure," Iryna said uncertainly. She was trying to understand Arthur's strange expression. "I didn't really have the chance to ask her. Once I told her I was about to go on a picnic with the king she started gushing. She spoke so quickly and didn't really stop. She was rather tall with brown hair if that helps."

"That's Gwen for you," Merlin muttered to himself as he hoisted himself on his horse. He turned to Iryna and Arthur. "We best be off. I can hear Arthur's stomach growling from here."

Iryna chuckled lightly when Arthur shot Merlin an angry look. "His isn't the only one," she said to ease Arthur's mortified expression. "I haven't had a proper meal in years."

Arthur frowned. Iryna had started to speak about what she had been through when she had been sold as a slave and when Morgana had chosen her, but it still upset Arthur to know the extent of what she had been through. "All the more reason to be on our way," Arthur said with a small smile. He held out his hand to Iryna and gently helped her onto her horse before mounting his own.

They took off after Merlin, neither of them willing to break the peaceful silence building between them. It wasn't awkward where they felt like it had to be filled, but rather it was pleasant as if they were conversing without using words.

It seemed as if they had only been riding for a couple of minutes before they came to a stop at a small clearing next to a beautiful creek. It was the perfect place for a picnic. Arthur glanced up at the sun, surprised to see they must have been riding for nearly an hour.

Merlin set up a large blanket on the soft grass and began to unpack the food that he had had the cook prepare. Once he had finished, he went to go lead the horses to water and find a place to sit and enjoy the bread and cheese he had snagged from the cook when she wasn't looking.

"Won't you be joining us?" Iryna asked when she saw Merlin walking away.

Arthur shot Merlin a look that quite clearly said 'don't you dare.' "No, I've got to make sure the horses eat," Merlin said.

"But you must be hungry," Iryna pointed out.

Merlin held up the little pouch with his meal. "I've got that covered," he assured her. "Now enjoy your meal."

Merlin walked away. When he sneaked a glance back at them, he was happy to see that they had both sat down on the blanket Merlin had set up.

Merlin brought the horses to the creek and let them drink their fill then he tethered them to a tree. He then wolfed down his food. He hadn't realized how hungry he was until he started eating.

Once he had finished, Merlin wracked his brain, trying to figure out what he should do. He figured it was inevitable that he would snoop on Arthur and Iryna. He just wanted to make sure that Arthur wasn't messing things up like he would normally do. Merlin figured that was a good enough reason to make sure their picnic was going well.

Merlin crouched behind a tree. He had a full view of their picnic, but was out of sight. He smiled as he watched Arthur feed Iryna a strawberry. Merlin wasn't close enough to hear their conversation, but he could hear that they were laughing. He took that as a good sign.

Merlin made himself comfortable and occasionally glanced over at Arthur and Iryna to make sure things were going well. He thought he was being so sneaky until… "You know Merlin, you'll be able to hear our conversation better if you are over here," Iryna called loudly. "I can feel that you are nearby."

Merlin groaned as he stood up. He was busted.

"You can feel it?" Arthur asked confused.

Iryna shrugged. "I'm not sure why I can do it. My master called it a gift," Iryna explained. "I can sense when there are people nearby, it's part of my gift. It's why my master chose me. I am good at finding people, even if they don't want to be found. I was hoping it was Merlin because if it wasn't it may have been a bandit and I would much rather it be Merlin."

Arthur chuckled. He had learned so much about Iryna today, but he felt like he still had much to learn. He looked forward to having the opportunity to learn more about her.

Merlin walked towards them. "I wasn't eavesdropping. I was just looking in every now and then to make sure you two were okay," Merlin explained.

"Uh huh," Iryna said, rolling her eyes.

"I swear! I didn't hear a thing you said," Merlin said seriously.

Arthur studied him. "He's telling the truth," he told Iryna.

"How can you tell?" Iryna asked him curiously.

"Because he didn't make up some excuse about how he's searching for woodworm," Arthur said with a small smile.

Iryna giggled. "I suppose he does that often?" She asked amused.

"Far too often for my liking," Arthur told her seriously. Despite his serious tone, Iryna could see his eyes twinkling with amusement. Suddenly a perplexed look came across his face. "Merlin? What were you doing in my chambers all those times you claimed you were checking for woodworm?"

"Saving your life," Merlin said nonchalantly. "I'll be by the horses when you are done."

Arthur turned back to Iryna. "Saving my life?" He asked to no one in particular.

"It wouldn't surprise me. Merlin spoke very highly of you," Iryna said honestly. "He doesn't seem like the kind of person that would make light of the task of keeping you safe."

Arthur nodded, but still looked perplexed. "What is bothering you?" Iryna asked him gently.

He sighed. "It's not important. I don't want it to spoil our picnic," he said hastily.

"Arthur," Iryna said. She moved her hand so it was over his. "What's wrong?"

Arthur looked into her large blue eyes, so filled with kindness and compassion. He felt like he could tell her anything. "It's just that I've known Merlin for nearly ten years, yet I feel like I only now am getting to know him," Arthur said seriously. "I don't know what to make of all of this. It's all so new to me. Just a few years ago, I would have had him beheaded for his magic. I would never have trusted someone who practiced magic and now I find myself fall–" Arthur cut himself off abruptly. He was about to say he was falling for a sorceress, but he couldn't say that out loud. At least not yet. He could barely make himself say the word sorceress out loud without flinching. He definitely wasn't ready to profess his love to one. Especially not when she was sitting next to him.

"It's okay to be frightened by what we are," Iryna said softly. "You spent your entire life hearing that sorcery was a force of evil, that it could never be harvested for good. That would have an impact on anyone. You are taking this remarkably well, but I'm willing to bet that it's almost killing you to put your faith in a servant that practices magic, or to sit next to a sorceress and share a meal with her."

"It's not killing me," Arthur said honestly. "I'll admit everything with Merlin is a little difficult. He did lie to me for ten years, but it's remarkably easy to sit here and talk to you. It's impossible to deny that you are completely ordinary aside from the whole magic thing." Arthur seemed to realize what he said. "And I mean ordinary in a good way. Not that you are boring or anything like that. I actually find your company rather enjoyable." Arthur looked away from her. He said far too much.

Arthur was surprised when he felt a sudden warmth on his cheek. He knew what it was, but he could scarcely believe she had just kissed his cheek. He turned to look at her and saw that her cheeks were filled with color and her eyes were filled with determination. Arthur lost all rational thought as he looked into her eyes.

He was barely aware of bridging the gap between them as he gently brushed his lips against hers. He felt an explosion of feeling the moment their lips touched. He didn't try to compare it to the kiss he had shared with Gwen all those years ago, because it didn't even begin to compare. When he kissed Gwen, he had felt safe and he had enjoyed it, but it was nothing like what he was feeling now.

Too soon, he broke the kiss. "Wow," he said softly.

"Wow," Iryna agreed as she leaned towards him again. Arthur willingly gave himself over to the kiss.

There was a time when Arthur wouldn't have been able to imagine that his manservant had sorcerer or that one day he would be falling in love with a sorceress. But that day had come.


	9. A Different Type of Heartbreak

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 9: A Different Type of Heartbreak

The next few weeks passed quickly. Arthur had never been more euphoric. He and Iryna had officially started courting. Merlin teased him about it often, emphasizing the irony that Arthur had fallen in love with a sorceress. As if Arthur didn't already realize that irony. It had taken Arthur a long time to really accept that.

Today was the day. Arthur was ready to take the next step with Iryna. Arthur was talking to Merlin anxiously. He and Iryna were to go on a picnic. They were going to the same place that they had gone on their first picnic.

It had been Arthur's idea… Well maybe Merlin had helped a little. Okay it was completely Merlin's idea, but Arthur was the one proposing so he was more than willing to take full credit for the plan. The ring that his father and given to his mother when he proposed to her was hanging from a chain around his neck. Arthur had always thought it felt weightless, but right now it seemed to bear the weight of a thousand anxious thoughts.

Arthur was pacing. "What if she says no?" Arthur asked.

"What is the cook actually makes something edible?" Merlin responded. Arthur looked at him confused. "Oh sorry. I thought we were asking things that are outside the realm of possibility."

Arthur rolled his eyes. "I'm serious," he said anxiously.

"So am I," Merlin told him sincerely. "Anyone with eyes can see how much you two love each other."

No matter what Merlin said, Arthur could not calm down. Hours passed as Arthur waited for the time that they would finally be off on their picnic and he would be asking Iryna the most important question he would ever ask someone. Merlin kept dozing off at Gaius's work bench. How he could sleep at a time like this, Arthur would never know.

Too soon, the sun was shining brightly in the sky and it was time to go. Arthur woke up Merlin who blinked a few times before he realized where he was. "Is it time?" Merlin asked sleepily as he rubbed his eyes.

"Yes," Arthur said nervously. He felt like there was something in his stomach doing somersaults.

Arthur followed Merlin like a lost puppy as he got a basket of food from the cook and then as he saddled two horses for Iryna and Arthur. This was one trip that Merlin would not be accompanying them on. Arthur needed to do this alone.

A few moment later Iryna showed up. Arthur had thought ahead and had gotten Merlin to pick flowers this time. Arthur had them tucked into the picnic basket and he whisked them out now and handed them to her. "They're beautiful," she said with a smile.

"So are you," Arthur said to her.

Iryna blushed. Much like their first picnic, Arthur helped her onto her horse. He held her hand slightly longer than necessary, only relinquishing it after he gently kissed it.

Arthur mounted his horse and they began to ride. This trip was filled with talking. They didn't talk about anything in particular. They just talked. It was nice for them.

Back in Camelot, Merlin watched as a shadow crept off into the woods. Normally, Merlin wouldn't have thought anything of it, but something felt off about it. Merlin felt a strange nausea in his stomach and somehow he knew he would regret it if he didn't follow this person.

Merlin crept behind them. They stayed on the outskirts of the forest, ducking into shadows and for all intents and purposes, staying hidden. When they had been walking nearly thirty minutes, the figure came to a stop. Merlin was far enough away to stay hidden, but close enough that he could see and hear everything.

Merlin nearly gasped when a second person joined the shadowed figure. While he didn't know who he had followed all the way out here, he recognized their companion. It was Morgana.

"What news have you for me?" Morgana asked.

"The king is going on a picnic with that girl," the man responded. Merlin frowned. He recognized their voice, but he couldn't place where he had heard it before. "They are going alone."

Morgana nodded. "Do you know where?" She asked.

The man shook his head. "His servant said something about a creek, but that's only what I caught from their conversation earlier. I was going to ask more questions when they came for the horses, but his servant saddled them," the man said.

Merlin's eyes widened. He finally knew who it was. It was the stable boy. Merlin would never have guessed. The stable boy blended in with the background, rarely sticking out. But it was the quiet ones you had to watch out for.

"The creek," Morgana said perplexed. Merlin could see the light bulb click in her eyes. She knew exactly where the creek was. "Of course. You have been most useful."

"It's my pleasure ma'am," the stable boy said sincerely.

"I suppose it's time to pay the king a visit," Morgana said with a cruel note in her voice. She glanced at the stable boy. "You have been most useful, but all useful things run their courses. I no longer have any need of you."

With a flick of her wrist, the stable boy crumpled to the ground. Just like that, he was dead. Merlin looked away and slowly backed up. He had to get to Arthur. His heart was pounding in his chest. Once he was sure he was far enough away that he wouldn't be heard, he ran. He needed to go back to the stable and get a horse. There was no chance he would get there in time if he walked the whole way.

Faster than he ever had before, Merlin saddled a horse. He urged his horse onward, pushing it to its limits. If Merlin weren't so desperate to get to Arthur, he would never have pushed the horse as he did. But Arthur's life was on the line and Merlin couldn't risk him like that.

Merlin feared he wouldn't get there in time. Morgana had a 30 minute head start over him and he didn't know if she had had a horse waiting for her.

Merlin burst into the clearing as Arthur was hugging Iryna. Arthur looked up at the intruder, surprised to see it was Merlin. "Merlin, what are you doing here?" Arthur asked.

If Merlin weren't too busy catching his breath, there were several things he might have noticed. One thing might have been the blush on Arthur's and Iryna's cheeks. Another might have been the ring that fit so perfectly on Iryna's finger. But most importantly, he might have noticed the shadow that was lurking in the background, waiting for the king to be distracted. And what better distraction was there.

The shadow stepped out into the light and threw a dagger. Morgana had learned from her past mistakes. There would be no gloating, no taunting. She wanted to get this over with. She wanted Arthur to be dead.

Merlin reacted on instinct, knocking Arthur out of the way of the dagger.

Arthur was knocked on his side and he felt an overwhelming sense of déjà vu. Just like when Merlin had saved Arthur by pulling him out of the way of the dagger, Arthur turned surprised to see Merlin next to him. Arthur was about to thank Merlin for saving him when he noticed the dagger protruding from Merlin's stomach. The blood drained from Arthur's face. He couldn't move, couldn't talk. His entire world seemed to revolve around the fact that Merlin was hurt.

Arthur didn't even look up to see who had thrown the dagger. In his heart, he knew exactly who it was, but he didn't want proof. Merlin was muttering a string of words under his breath. There was barely any volume to his words. When he finished his spell, his eyes flickered open and closed and Arthur caught a flash of gold in his normally blue eyes.

Arthur heard a gasp and for the first time, he looked away from Merlin. He looked to Iryna, the source of the gasp, and followed her gaze. Morgana was floating and was covered with a bright blue light that seemed to be getting tighter around her. Morgana almost looked like she was shrinking until finally the blue light burned white. The light exploded in what looked like a flurry of snow that fell to the ground.

Somewhere in Arthur's head, he recognized that Morgana must be dead. He recognized it, but he couldn't process it. Not while Merlin was dying.

"Can you heal him?" Arthur asked Iryna frantically. Merlin's breathing was coming in ragged gasps.

"I don't know," Iryna said terrified. She wasn't trying to hide her tears. "I don't know the spell that would do it. I've never practiced healing magic before. But I might be able to find something in Merlin's magic book."

"We must get him back to Gaius," Arthur said, his resolve hardening. Arthur mounted Merlin's horse, being careful not to jostle Merlin too much. He waited for Iryna to mount her own horse and then they took off towards Camelot. Neither of them spoke as they rode. Iryna understood what Arthur was going through. Even if he was the last one to admit it, Arthur cared a great deal for Merlin.

When they got back to Camelot, Arthur dismounted his horse and stood holding Merlin while he waited for Iryna. "Don't wait for me," Iryna ordered him. "Get him to Gaius. I'll be right there."

Arthur felt guilty leaving her behind. She was to be his wife, he was supposed to put her above all else. But he knew he needed to get Merlin to Gaius if he wanted him to survive. Arthur reluctantly left Iryna behind and sprinted to Gaius's chambers. He burst inside to see Gaius poring over some concoction he was making for one of his many patients.

Gaius looked up annoyed at the intrusion until he saw Merlin. His face paled and he cleared off his workshop table. He laid down a sheet and instructed Arthur to put Merlin on top of it. As Gaius dressed the wound, Arthur filled him in on what happened. At some point Iryna came in. She didn't say a word to them, she just went into Merlin's chambers and grabbed his magic book. When she came back out to Gaius's workshop, Merlin looked even worse. He was pale and his breathing had slowed down.

"How bad is he?" Iryna asked.

"There is only so much I can do," Gaius said softly. "Without magic, he will die."

Iryna could feel her tears pooling in her eyes, but she refused to cry. She had to find the spell to help Merlin and it wasn't going to help if she couldn't read the words on the page because of her tears.

It seemed like hours had passed as Iryna looked through the book. The only thing that kept her looking was the sporadic breathing she heard coming from Merlin. Finally, when she was ready to give up, she found it. At the very bottom of a page, in very small writing, under a very large picture of a man with a sword sticking out of him, was the spell.

Gaius stopped what he was doing to Merlin when he saw Iryna stand up. He and Arthur moved out of the way to give her some space.

Iryna brought the book over to Merlin. She rested it on his chest as she put her hands over his wound. Iryna concentrated harder than she ever had before. "Efencume aetgaedre eala gastas: gesticie pis lic forod!" She chanted. Her eyes were closed as she focused.

When Iryna opened her eyes, she hoped to see Merlin's wound healing itself. She had hoped to see color returning to his face, life returnimg to his eyes. But nothing happened.

Again and again, Iryna chanted the spell until she was saying it like a mantra. Over and over again she said it until Merlin took his last shuddering breath.

You could hear a pin drop.

Arthur stared in shock. It didn't seem possible, yet the proof was before him in the still body of his manservant. He remembered how once, long ago, he and Merlin had spoken about the different kinds of heartbreak. Arthur could feel his heart breaking and this was the worst one he had suffered yet. It was one that left him feeling like he was choking on air.

Dead. His manservant was dead. His best friend was dead.

*Hides behind laptop* Please don't hate me!


	10. It Makes it All Better

Season 2, Episode 4

Story 17: Does it Make it Better

Chapter 10: It Makes it All Better

For a moment, no one responded. They couldn't have if they wanted to. No one knew how to respond. What are you supposed to do or say when the impossible had happened?

It didn't seem possible that Merlin was gone. Merlin who was so full of life. Merlin who always put everyone else before his own needs. Merlin who had been on the receiving end of the dagger meant for Arthur. He was gone.

Gaius recovered first. He clutched Merlin's wrist. At first Arthur didn't understand what he was doing. "He's still alive," Gaius said softly. He didn't allow the smile to cross his face. Merlin was alive, but weak. He may be too far gone for even magic to bring him back. Arthur felt hope rise up in him. Merlin was alive. That meant there was still the possibility that he would survive this. Arthur ignored the grave look on Gaius's face. He didn't want to think about what that look meant. The more Arthur tried to ignore it, the more he thought about it. He knew that look meant that Gaius had already given up. "There is movement in his wrist. He doesn't have long, but he still has a chance." Gaius turned to Iryna. "You need to put everything into this spell. If you cannot do this, he will die."

Gaius felt guilty pressuring Iryna with that knowledge, but it had always worked to motivate Merlin. Gaius hoped it would do the same for Iryna.

Iryna closed her eyes, allowing herself to feel her magic. She concentrated until she was no longer a girl who had magic. She was magic. "Efencume aetgaedre eala gastas: gesticie pis lic forod!" She screamed. She shaped her magic around the words she had shouted, concentrating more than she had ever concentrated before. She willed the magic to do her bidding, to bring Merlin back to them. She opened her eyes in time for them to flash gold. She had never felt anything like it before. The power that washed through her into Merlin was nearly overwhelming. It symbolized all things good and right. Surely something like that would work and would heal Merlin. When her spell was complete, Iryna slumped against the table exhausted and Arthur quickly rushed to her side to steady her. She had never attempted something like this before and was surprised by the sudden fatigue that had followed it. For a moment, nothing happened.

Then Merlin's hand went slack in Gaius's hold. Gaius squeezed his wrist, praying to feel the faint fluttering that had been there before. There was nothing. The grim look on Gaius's face gave them their answer.

Iryna turned to Arthur and buried her face in his chest and let her sobs wrack through her. She hadn't been able to do it. She had failed.

Gaius gently placed Merlin's hand over his chest and turned away from him. He couldn't bear to look at Merlin and know that he would never see him smile again, he would never hear him complain about Arthur, he would never see the determination that consumed him whenever Arthur was in danger. Gaius had never wanted children and he had been reluctant to take Merlin in in the first place. But Merlin had become a son to him and Gaius had never experienced such pain before. He thought it had been bad when he had lost his love, Alice, but at least she had been alive. He had thought it had been bad when he lost a good friend when Uther passed away, but that didn't compare to how he felt now.

The unimaginable had happened. Merlin was the reason Arthur and Iryna were together in the first place. Merlin was the reason everyone in the room was still alive. He had saved all of their lives at some point or another. It was hard to believe that someone that held so much good was gone.

Arthur tightened his hold on Iryna, fighting the grief that threatened to consume him. He had prided himself on being strong and never letting another person control his emotions, but Merlin was making it difficult. Arthur was too shocked and overwhelmed to be able to respond. After a moment he rested his forehead on Iryna's and allowed the tears to fall. He knew he was gripping Iryna tightly, but she wasn't complaining and he couldn't make himself loosen his hold on her. He needed something to cling to, something to give him hope that somehow there was something to look forward to outside of this tragedy. A sob wracked through Arthur and he couldn't hold it in.

"Cheer up. You're getting married, shouldn't you be happy?"

Arthur spun around, barely able to believe his eyes. He quickly dried his eyes as he looked at Merlin. "You-you're alive?" Arthur asked uncertainly.

"No, I'm a ghost come back to haunt you," Merlin teased.

Before Arthur was aware of what he was doing, he threw his arms around Merlin and engulfed him in a hug. As impossible as it had been to believe that Merlin had died it was even more difficult to believe he was alive now. Once he came to his senses, Arthur quickly stepped back and cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I'm glad you're not dead," Arthur said sincerely.

"Thanks," Merlin said, rolling his eyes.

After Arthur, Iryna hugged Merlin. "You're alive!" Iryna screamed through her tears. Words couldn't describe what Iryna was feeling in that moment. She was relieved that Merlin was okay, still terrified that they had almost lost him, proud that she had succeeded in casting the spell, guilty because if she hadn't been able to cast the spell Merlin would be dead. Those emotions and more were all a swirling whirlwind inside of her that was threatening to drive her mad.

"Why does everyone keep saying that?" Merlin asked them amused. Once Iryna stepped back from their hug and rejoined Arthur, Merlin turned to Gaius.

Gaius was like a father to him, Merlin knew his injury must have taken its toll on him. When Gaius met Merlin's gaze, he allowed his pride to show. Merlin had turned into a truly spectacular man.

Merlin swung his legs to the side of the table and stood up. He was a little wobbly, but he was quickly able to steady himself. Gaius embrace Merlin, much like a father would embrace his son. "I'm proud of you m'boy," Gaius said gruffly, as he tried to hide how emotional Merlin almost dying had made him.

"I'm proud of you too," Iryna said with a small smile. "That you for saving Arthur. You have no idea what he means to me."

Iryna glanced at Arthur expectantly. When he didn't say anything, she elbowed him and looked from him to Merlin. "Oh yes," Arthur said quickly. He didn't want to get elbowed again. Iryna had really bony elbows and she hurt! "Thank you for saving me and for killing Morgana. It is much appreciated."

Merlin rolled his eyes. "Your words are too kind," Merlin told him. Merlin suddenly became serious. He glanced at where Arthur and Iryna held hands. "So when's the big date?" Merlin asked with a small smile.

"I wouldn't know. Someone came barging into the clearing right after my heartfelt proposal," Arthur teased.

"Heartfelt proposal," Iryna said with a snort. "I thought you were telling me that you were dying or something. He sits down across from me and says, 'I don't know how you are going to take this, but there's something I need to tell you'."

"She froze and her eyes got all big. I was worried that something was wrong with her," Arthur said with a small smile. "She held up her hand and said 'If you're dying, lie to me and tell me you're not dying'."

"Then this prat goes 'I'm not dying'. Of course I thought he was dying. I just told him to lie to me," Iryna said defensively.

"It took me several minutes to calm her down and assure her that I really wasn't dying," Arthur explained. "The entire time she was blabbering about how I needed to tell you and Gaius because surely one of you would be able to help me."

"What else was I supposed to think?" Iryna asked. "Finally he just asked me to marry him."

"If someone wasn't freaking out so much it would have been much more heartfelt," Arthur pointed out.

Merlin watched them go back and forth. They were a match made in heaven, they were. Both stubborn and hard-headed, but they both were kind and compassionate. Arthur was a great king and Iryna would make a wonderful queen.

Four days later, they married. Arthur was clutching Iryna's hand for dear life as they sat down on the new thrones and listened to the calls of "Long live the queen!"

He didn't let go of her hand as many noblemen and ladies approached them to give them their good wishes and congratulations. After the nobility, Arthur knights approached him. Then the common folk that had been huddled in the back, fortunate enough to have gotten in before there wasn't any more room.

The last people to approach them were Merlin and Gaius. Arthur barely registered what Gaius was saying, his eyes were locked with Merlin's. It was almost overwhelming how much pride Arthur saw in Merlin's eyes. It made Arthur realize that if Merlin was proud of him, he must be doing something right.

"Does it make it better?" Merlin asked Arthur quietly. He didn't look away from Arthur. Arthur knew exactly what he was asking him.

Arthur ignored the strange looks that Iryna and Gaius were shooting them as he considered Merlin's question. He had known the answer to it before he had even known it was a question. "Yes," Arthur said with a huge smile, glancing at his beautiful bride. When he looked back at his best friend, his heart swelled with happiness. He couldn't imagine being in a better place right now. "You were right. It makes it all better."

The End

I really do try this whole one-shot thing, but then chapters happen and it stops being a one-shot. I hope you enjoyed this! Let me know what you think! Did you love it? Hate it?

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is kind of my challenge to myself. I'm writing one fanfiction for each episode of Merlin. Some are one-shots, some are longer stories. I ran out of ideas for fanfictions so this is how I'm dealing with that. If anyone has any prompts for me, feel free to leave it in a review and if I write it after I finish writing these 65 stories, I'll dedicate it to you… so, thanks. And I give you Season 2 Episode 4.


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